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Liz Barker is a mother, a wife, a writer and a breast cancer survivor. In this blog, she remembers he diagnosis at 34 years old - while pregnant with her son. 

What are the odds of being the One?

We know the basics: Breast cancer will, on average, strike one out of 9 women. What we don’t know is who that unlucky “one” will be. Is there a certain typecast to be that “one?"

Unfortunately, as was the case with my diagnosis, there is often no stereotypical reason to be the “one.” In 1991, I became that “one.”

At the time, I was a healthy 34 year old with no family history of the disease. To make matters worse, I was also 5 ½ months pregnant with a healthy baby. Imagine the shock factor!

Initially, I was advised at another health system to terminate this healthy pregnancy “to save my life” and “to live to be a mother to my toddler son and a wife to my husband.” This doctor did not know my back story though, and why his rash recommendations were a double whammy to me.

One year prior, we had just buried our 3-year-old daughter Lauren, who endured a tragic death from a hospital infection after surgery. Lauren had Down Syndrome. What were the odds of my first baby having Down Syndrome, a genetic defect, when I was only 29, and again, no family history?

With odds like this, I should have been playing the lottery.

Champion By Choice

After the shock of the breast cancer diagnosis wore off, and with the help of my supportive family, I got a second opinion with cancer specialists, rather than act on the advice of that local surgeon. The plan was for me to have the mastectomy and begin a course of chemo one month later, when I began my third trimester of pregnancy. Chemo during the last trimester would not be as detrimental because the fetus’s vital organs would already be formed. I was told that my son “might be slow or might be small.” I didn’t care because after losing Lauren, my heart was broken and I did not want to give up on this healthy baby.

Surgery went fine. I only had two lymph nodes that were malignant. I tolerated chemo well enough both during and after pregnancy while juggling my toddler and then my newborn. In retrospect, I don’t know how I pulled this off, but I wasn’t working, that’s for sure.

My son Bryan was born perfect, at eight pounds even, despite being induced at 38 weeks. But, of course I worried about the long-term effects of the cancer and chemo on him, and of my continued good health. I was determined to survive and to enjoy my family. I ate healthy, I walked and exercised, and I stayed positive. After my traditional medical treatments and reconstruction, I then went through a homeopathic care plan with a doctor of naturopath. The homeopathic remedies were dispensed to cleanse my body of the chemo toxins and to build up my immune system. I also took advantage of my employer’s disability insurance that allowed me a respite to do these things and to heal my mind/body/spirit. I am forever thankful to them for supporting me through this very difficult time.

Today, at age 56, I am a 22-year cancer survivor. Bryan graduated from University of Pennsylvania this past spring and won a full scholarship for graduate school to obtain his PhD in neuroscience!

And, he has been a varsity athlete for years. So much for the “slow and small” prediction about him… There isn’t a day that goes by that I am not thankful for having him.

Two years ago, at would have been Lauren’s 25th birthday, I wanted to do something special to honor her. With the help of so many wonderful people, I hosted a very successful fundraiser to benefit handicapped children and The Arc. The event created such good karma for me that I was inspired to dust off my long time “book quest dream,” writing my personal story to inspire others. The apt title is Changed by Chance…Champion by Choice. I plan to be published soon.

Please visit my blog at www.changedbychance.com to learn more about me and my amazing story. Namaste.